I know I promised to answer some questions, and I will, but right now I feel compelled to talk about the last month or so.

  We had some sad things happen that were hard to deal with.   These things are hard on any couple.  People act differently when consumed with emotion.  Differently, perhaps better, perhaps worse, but different.  Different can be problematic for a couple that has found their groove.  Things are chugging along and life is good and suddenly they are just ‘different’.

  Maybe you’ve always thought of the Dominant in a relationship as nurturing.  Maybe you have yet to consider that idea. When things get mixed up, it is easy to fall into the “old way” of doing things. Or to just fall into the routines of everyday life.  We were doing  just that.  I was keeping myself too busy to even notice that my submissive reserves were depleated.  We went on like that for a while.  I was feeling unhappy and attributed it all to the challenges we’ve been facing.  Of course, some of it was  because of the sad circumstances, but not all.

  He is smart enough to know I am not truly happy under any circumstances without the D/s aspect of our relationship being reenforced regularly.  He forced me to take care of myself.  He required I slow down the pace of our lives for a while.  Only because of my submission to him was I able to give our entire family what we needed.  I would have continued on trying to be superwoman had he not stepped in and announced that it’s OK to not attend EVERY holiday function, that people can take no for an answer and that if we don’t take good care of each other, we’ll be too burnt out to help anyone else.  I begrudgingly told a committee that they cannot count on me this year as he stood over me while I talked on the phone.  I canceled some plans with some family members even after they laid on the guilt and I was angry that he had but his foot down.  Our Christmas was much lower key this year because he had decreed it.  I complied while I rolled my eyes (and got sat on the floor by him for a stern conversation) and eventually realized he was right. 

  Sometimes families need to “hole up” in order to pull through together.  During the holidays when that can be logistically tricky, it takes a very strong leader to make it happen.  Very VERY strong and I thank God for him.

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