Well, midwest summer is in full swing and our little family is brimming with family fun.  We’ve had long days with all the kids, swimming, playing ball, picnicking.  It has been glorious.

As I laid in bed last night, I felt I had an odd emotion tugging at me around the edges.  I didn’t know what to think.  He has had more time than usual with us and we’ve had a lot of fun with the kids.  He got in bed and fell asleep after a quick peck on the cheek.

I realized that my submissive tank is running a little low.  I’ve done all the little things I do to please Him and last night I made my body fully ready for Him before he joined me in bed, so outwardly I’m still submitting to His wishes.   But, as I’ve said before I only get submissive feelings when He is taking control and/or dominating me.  That doesn’t really happen too much with the kids around and at night, if He’s tired He sleeps.

I am ashamed to admit that it briefly crossed my mind to dosomething, start something, push Him, I don’t know, anything to get him in a big old Dominant mindset so He would feel the need to control the situation.  I let him doze off next to me because that is what he wanted at that moment. 

 After a few minutes, it struck me that he did just control the situation, didn’t he?  Maybe not how I would have chosen, but such is the life of a submissive.

God bless you dear readers,

God’s gift to him

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