This question was in the comment section yesterday…

I do have a question… do you ever just make love? I mean old fashioned, no power transfer lovemaking?


The short answer is yes, quite often.

The longer answer can be understood by anyone currently having married sex. 

Sometimes you are so drawn to the other person and you make sweet emotional love to each other.  It’s less about physical needs and more about being close.

Sometimes you are just plain horny and God gave you a person to help meet those physical needs.

It’s the same with us.  I’d say we make love about once to twice a week even though we have sex much, much more than that.  Just the other day we were working on a photo  project and started talking about when the kids were babies and we got very emotional and had the softness little lovemaking session. We kissed and nuzzled and I cried because it was so beautiful. No one was in charge.  No one was submissive.

Later that same day I was pressed up against the wall as I showered. No kissing, no eye contact, just a stern voice in my ear telling me to keep still.  It was exciting and powerful.

Which one is better?  Do I have to pick?   

 They are both a wonderful part of our marriage.  Both are keys to why we are so happy.  They each feed a different area our relationship. 

 Every couple needs to connect deeply and each couple needs some excitement.  Sometimes sex can do both.