So we’ve talked about it. Do we have a new definition for us? We don’t think we are in a ‘spanking relationship’. He says I don’t need to fear a spanking as punishment for messing up. (If that is how your relationship works, I’m glad you figured out what works for you. It just doesn’t work for us right now.)
He says he reserves the right to keep it in his back pocket to pull out if we fall away from our roles as we both have defined them. I’m cool with that. I mean, I guess it’s always been that way even though we had not spanked. I’ve given him the power to make decisions regarding our relationship and this was never completely “off the table” it just wasn’t discussed much. Now, it’s out there on the table in full view and may or may not get dusted off in the future.
How does this change our relationship? The spanking option itself doesn’t change anything at all. The fact that he took charge a few weeks ago and went ahead with a decision he made by himself only adds to the respect I already had.
That’s about it.
Spanking changes some relationships drastically. I think this may be because they used it early on to establish the roles, which is totally fine and sometimes necessary. We already knew how we were going to relate to each other the rest of our lives. So although the spanking accomplished the task of the day (“recalibrating” as BabyMan called it), it wasn’t needed to define an entire marriage. We had already done that.
God bless,
gg
You are smart to not let one interaction define your relationship. You were happy before your spanking and you are still happy, so there is no need to redefine yourselves.
You are right, thank you.
I really like the way you are approaching this. Spanking really is one tool in the tool box, one some couple might or might not chose to use to create the dynamic they desire. In truth the longer spanking is a part of our lives, the less important it becomes. My husband spanks often, but for us as well, it does not define who we are.
Thank you Sara. Wise words from someone with more experience with life and ‘the lifestyle’ are always appreciated. I learn a lot from all my pals in blogland. Now only if I could get him to read others’ blogs too!
We are new to discipline in a Dominant/submissive marriage (or whatever abbreviation floats you boat.)
Recently I corrected my wife for a very serious infraction that violated trust. When I had her assume the position, and subsequently spanked her, she was confused, surprised and bewildered. She wasn’t angry, upset or outraged. She was completely taken aback.
I spanked her briefly but believed that her buttocks should have been reddened and stinging for days and, when she sat, a reminder of her serious violation of trust and of my seriousness as her dominant husband.
I believe that vigorous spanking has a place in healthy marriages and want to incorporate it. I would appreciation ANY advice from you or your readers. Thank you!
You are right miss..
For us, we`ve been married for 10 years, and i always respected William, he`s my man and he`d do anything to keep me still.We always had even in high school, a relation where i was submissive. So when we got married, that didnt changed but William decided i needed to be spanked when i wouldnt fill my role of wife, i agreed in 5 seconds with him. My role is to please him, and listen to him, he is my man and must help me keeping me on track, he cant accept or handle me yelling and acting childish, as im only human, i need corrections some times. Now that i gaved him 5 childrens, i am also a mother at home, and perfeclty happy with. William wanted his wife to stay home and take care of his kids, and i love my sweets hearts. We have William Jr,9 Wyatt 8 Kristy-Leah 5, Hayley Marie 3 and my lil one, Destiny Elisabeth.. Id do anytthing for my familys sake, and if my husband has to spank me to help me improve on my weaknesses, i want it right away
wish you were still here